Adulthood 101

I think that in high school they should offer a class called Adulthood 101 and you should be required to pass it in order to graduate. In this class, they would teach basic life skills such as:

1. How to tie a tie.

Believe it or not, both genders need to know this. Just when you think it's not important to know because you're a woman and you don't wear ties... you're 24 with 2 kids and you've married a man who doesn't know how to tie a tie. Suddenly you're scrambling around on YouTube because you've bought your husband a tie for an event in which he must wear a tie and neither of you know how.

2. How to cook the following items:

Rice
Mac N Cheese
Pancakes

3 essentials. You think you're poor in high school because you make minimum wage and you want to buy a pair of jeans that cost your entire paycheck? Wait till you're in your 20's, making minimum wage, trying to pay rent and bills with that same paycheck. You will need to know how to make pancakes.

3. With that being said, you will also need to be able to run a mile. Although not necessarily essential based on how much you care about your health...but if you're going to live off pancakes, ramen and the like... You're going to want to embrace exercise.

4. How to stock your closet to look like you are a functioning adult. The key here is that you don't have to actually be a functioning adult, but you do need to look like one. They should provide you with a list of the basics; staples in both black and white, jeans, a black dress, etc. But most importantly: Jackets. So important. You can't wear a ski jacket to a wedding and you can't wear a peacoat to the gym,etc. I mean... you CAN...but you shouldn't.

5. Ringing out the sponge when you're done is lifesaving.

6. Laundry. I feel like an entire semester could and should be dedicated to the secrets of laundry. Many marriages could be saved, if we all just knew how to do laundry. You're going to spend the rest of your life doing it, might as well figure out now that there's a reason you wash towels separately, and theres also a reason you don't throw a brand new red towel in with your whites. I entered college not even knowing which machine was which. It was tragic. You live, you learn... but your clothes, they don't always survive.

7. Never burn bridges with people who drive trucks. And always maintain friendships with lots of strong guys. There will inevitably come a time when you need to move. Or be a mormon, because they're awesome in that department as well.

8. Bills, bank accounts, credit cards, ETC. I truly have never understood why they don't teach you about this in high school. Or maybe they did and I wasn't listening? It's possible. BUT still, they should have had a flashing sign or something that told me that this was IMPORTANT.

Budgets: lifechanging. Treat it like a Nike slogan. Just Do It.

Credit Cards: love/hate relationship. Treat your bank account like you treat your best frienemy. Because that's exactly what it will always be to you. Keep it in perspective.

Bank Accounts: You know that one friend, your BFF when it comes to texting? That's your bank account. Talk to it and talk to it frequently. Always check up on him and see how he's feeling. If you haven't texted in awhile, replenish the well and send him a hello text.

9. Call your mom.

Until you start your own family, she's the only one who really cares. You'll find that out when you're barfing green turf on the morning of New Year's Eve.

10. Most importantly: treat people the way you want to be treated. Don't be a judgemental prick, and always take the high road.